Florida to Secede and be part of the UK

Floridians Can’t Count – Queen Elizabeth To Take Charge

Florida to Secede and be part of the UK

Florida to Secede the Union – Check Out the List of All New British Leadership

Florida, who’s in charge? U.S. elections over and the State of Florida could not turn in election results in on time.

You can’t have your cake and eat it too” said Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth.

Americans gave up on the Sunshine State’s inability to count. Florida has been kicked out of the Union and will now be a British Colony.

Rumour has it that Miami-Dade County couldn’t even use fingers to count. In 2000 they blamed it on hanging chads (remember Bush-Gore?). What’s the excuse now? It must be a conspiracy!

The British Monarch has big plans for Floridashire, a place where the sun actually shines!

  1. Her Royal Highness QEII will spend most of the year here. A new McMansion Castle is to be built in Key Biscayne.
  2. All Royal Subjects will be taught to count with their fingers.
  3. Cake Etiquette is to supply all official Royal Cakes and Desserts.
  4. Floridashire will have its own government and defense forces.
  5. The Queen appointed highly qualified British Citizens (see below list) to fill the new role of Prime Minister and Cabinet Members.
  6. In the deal, USA’s President Obama was also forced to give up (reason below) the City of Las Vegas, Nevada.

New Floridashire Government Appointees:

Simon Cowell President X-Factor Cake Etiquette

Prime Minister

Simon Cowell – Because he’s got the X-Factor.

David Beckham Cake Etiquette

Vice President

David Beckham – Cried for days until she gave him the job.

First Lady USA - President Cake

First Lady

With Simon Cowell as Prez the position of First Lady will be a Rotating Position.

Daniel Craig - James Bond Cake

Department of Homeland Security

Daniel Craig (James Bond 007) – License to kill.


Mr Bean - Blackadder - Johnny EnglishDepartment of the Treasury

Rowan Atkinson (Mr. Bean) – Certified Bean Counter.

Baron Cohen (Borat - Ali G - Bruno) Cake Etiquette

Department of State

Sacha Baron Cohen (Borat – Bruno – Ali G)

Anthony Hopkins (Hannibal Lecter - Psycho) Cake

Department of Agriculture

Sir Anthony Hopkins (Silence of the Lambs)

Prince Harry - Las Vegas Party - Cake

Mayor of Las Vegas

Prince Harry (The Hangover)



Hugh Grant - Affairs - Nanny - Cake

Department of Veteran Affairs

Hugh Grant (Notting Hill, Four Weddings and a Funeral)

Kate Moss (Model - Coke Addict - Drugs) Cake

Department of Health and Human Services

Kate Moss (Super Model)

Jason Statham (Snatch Crank Bank Job) Cake

Department of Transportation

Jason Statham ( The Transporter)

Kate Winslet (Titanic Ship - Reader) Cake

Secretary of the Navy

Kate Winslet (Titanic)



Harry Potter (Goblet - Chamber - Philosophers - Prisoner - Order of - Hallows - Half Blood) Cake

Department of Defense

Daniel Radcliffe (Harry Potter – The F Word)

Sarah - Fergie (Prince William) Cake

Department of Commerce

Sarah Ferguson (Duchess of York)

Gordon Ramsay - Chef - Restaurant - Michelin Star - Cake

Department of Energy

Gordon Ramsay (Hell’s Kitchen)

Monty Python (Spamalot - Flying Circus - Holy Grail) CakeDepartment of Education

Monty Python Crew (Flying Circus – Spamalot – Holy Grail)


Thank you and God Save the Queen!

Cake Etiquette - Cakes Desserts Cupcakes Cookies & Custom Masterpieces

Who else do you think should be appointed? And to what position? (Comment Below)